I claim no right, nor any expertise to speak about suicide, (which is a bad urge,)
except that I urge against it.
Even so, I share my life experiences witth you about suicides I know of personally.
It is called 'Suicide 2' and is located in the 'Urges' section of this website
I give you this phone number and website address, which has a ‘chat’ option.
Use it if you need it.
1-800-273-8255
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
Eric J. Rose
middlegrademysteries